To the editor:

June 19 was the last day of school. It was supposed to have been a happy, joyful day for all the students.

Instead, one child I noticed was fighting back tears. She was heartbroken because at the “end of the year” assembly she did not receive an award.

Numerous “awards” were given out to numerous children, leaving the children who were not recognized in any way feeling left out.

Why is it that our society begins “awarding” children at such young ages for just being children? Isn’t every child at ages 5, 6 and

7 striving to do the very best they can, to the best of their ability, given their developmental stage and the environment they come from?

To recognize some and not all at this age sends a message to some children that they don’t quite measure up enough to somebody’s “standard” of who they should be. Why not just all stand up together at the end of the year and give a big cheer because everyone completed the school year?

I know there are people who think that children need to learn how to “lose” or “not be picked,” and they need to “toughen up” because that’s life. Why? Why at this young age should children feel they are not “good enough?” They have the rest of their lives to have to “measure up” to society’s standards. Why start in primary school?

Alfie Kohn, a very thought-provoking writer on the subject of awards, competition and what these ingrained practices are really doing to our kids says, “the more we slather on the praise, the more kids seem to need it, so we praise them some more. Sadly, some of these kids will grow into adults who continue to need someone else to pat them on the head and tell them whether what they did was OK. Surely this is not what we want for our daughters and sons.”

It is appropriate to recognize kids as they grow into young adults for outstanding achievement, service to their community and success in the areas in which they strive diligently to succeed in.

But only if we also recognize the teenagers who must hold down a job, help out their family and do many things on their own.

For some children and teenagers, just getting to school every day is a major achievement. It seems that our society tends to recognize the stars that shine the brightest. Let us not forget the stars that may be dimmer, but are constant and steady, just maybe not as noticeable.

All the children who received awards on the last day of school surely felt happy, proud and motivated, and those are wonderful feelings for a child to have. All children should feel that way. But some children, who were not “recognized,” left school that day with their spirits crushed. And if one child’s spirit is crushed, it’s one child too many.

Leslie Yingling

Langley