Dear Santa,

I wanted to write you a letter and send it, but due to the holiday backlog I know there is no way it will arrive in time. Your voicemail box is full and, since you and the elves union refuse to embrace the technology of today, I cannot text, snap or IM you my list. I am left with no other recourse but to publish this. Also note, this is not my exhaustive list, but merely my most important.

I wish for peace on earth. This encompasses but is not limited to ending COVID, reversing global warming and ending war, famine and basically anything terrible we have created for ourselves. I know this may be beyond your Christmas cheer capabilities, so no pressure.

I wish for more affordable housing solutions on the island. Rent is crushing families and new graduates. There needs to be more efforts like those of the county commissioners to drive conversations about providing livability to our residents.

I wish for businesses here on the island to finally find the staffing they need. Mr. Claus, there is a worker shortage that we haven’t faced in a long while down here in the lower 48. While some in office are adamant that ending worker benefits would resolve this, we still haven’t seen much improvement, despite historically low unemployment rates.

I wish for thousands more readers of our content. Staying aware of what is happening in our community is vital, and a need to keep ourselves informed is how we avoid repeating missteps time and time again as a society.

I wish for more contributions from the community for our letters to the editor. They can be serious, they can be sarcastic, they can be funny or they can be enthusiastic. If we can get more letters, that would be fantastic. … Seriously, we need more letters.

And now, a little levity.

I wish for a medical degree for Joe Rogan. Santa, I know he wants to be a doctor really badly and, if you could just grant him that, he can finally be qualified to talk about contagious diseases. I know millions would celebrate and thousands of lives saved.

I wish happiness for Brandon Brown. It’s unfortunate that a race car driver who went from experiencing one of the greatest moments of his life has been turned into the equivalent of an elementary-school curse word. Next time you want to chant it out, make sure this young man is racing that day.

I wish for Joe Manchin to realize he is really a Republican, so we can all stop pretending Democrats have the Senate.

Finally, I wish for each and every one of you a safe holiday season. Please use caution on the roads and, if you enjoy a holiday drink this year, find a driver. We need you here to celebrate this time next year.

Merry Christmas.