He’s an Oak Harbor city council member, known for his patience and his willingness to listen to constituents. And there’s a story behind the man.

“In my day job,” says Bryan Stucky, “I try to make things easier for the families I serve by being kind, and showing compassion.”

His day job is at Wallin-Stucky Funeral Home. As a funeral director, he shows up every morning dedicated to smoothing the road for grieving families.

So how did he end up in politics? “I just wanted to help,” says Stucky. “It wasn’t just one issue. I wanted to listen to people. I wanted to get the little things done,” meaning things grizzled bureaucrats might miss.

He tells the story of a postal carrier who pointed out a missing street sign to him. She was having trouble training new mail carriers on where exactly the street was. Stucky made a phone call. “Within a couple days, we got that sign up.” The mail carrier was amazed. Stucky grins like a Super Bowl champ as he recalls that seemingly-insignificant victory. “Not a big deal, but… to her, it was huge.”

Responsiveness is just a piece of Stucky’s approach to his service on the council. He faces contentious issues with respect and a calm, listening ear.

When he debates issues, “before I do or say anything, I try to ask myself ‘is it civil?’ I try to find at least one thing we can agree on. It helps to take personalities out of it and stick to policy, and that leads to better dialogue.”

Stucky is active on the minefield that is social media, because it helps him understand what’s happening in our community and enhances communication with the public. Sadly, back in his day job, he has seen families’ grief after suicides that trace back to online bullying. So he tries to bring kindness and respect to that world too.

Followers of Whidbey Facebook pages are familiar with Stucky’s approach to online controversy. Even in his replies to the most raucous comments on city politics, he’s been praised for his uncanny ability to boil complex issues down to factual, understandable pieces… without talking down or denigrating anyone. An explanation of the law behind a council decision, or a rundown of the reasoning driving a policy, feels genuine and respectful when it comes from Stucky. He commonly gets a “thank you” from the people he replies to.

“It’s easy to take quick jabs online,” he says. “It takes a lot of work to be informed. I let people know their perspective matters, and I try not to let my ego get in the way.”

He has a deeper goal too. He wants people to get involved.

“Everyone has the right to be heard, but many are not aware of the best way to go about it. So I make the effort to encourage them to share their opinions, to engage.”

Stucky cites open volunteer positions on boards and commissions that go begging for citizens to take part. That forces officials to recruit people, usually those they already know, to step up. For example, recent recommendations from the Oak Harbor Salary Commission led to outrage and accusations from citizens – citizens who could have participated on the commission themselves.

And that, in turn, can lead to bad press. During our meeting, Stucky winces at a spare copy of the News-Times blaring “Oak Harbor Council sees pay raise” on the front page.

Sometimes engagement takes only a few minutes. Stucky makes it his mission to encourage those on Facebook to take the next step beyond social media – a public comment or an emailed comment directly to the council.

“We read every one of your emails. We hear every one of your public comments.” He hopes to hear from people who might teach him something new. “I want to know what citizens are passionate about. We (the Council) need to reach out, learn, understand people, and not drop other issues over one new priority. We’re all connected here.”

Stucky knows he’s lucky to serve among community leaders he admires. He’s learned plenty in a short time, and he’s quick to name the people and the qualities that impress him most.

“A thick skin, even when someone blames the council and it’s not our fault. Courage to make firm decisions and be accountable. A cool head, the ability to leave emotions at the door. Visibility in the community, at ribbon cuttings and events. Accessibility when people have a request.”

Stucky holds himself to a tough standard on accessibility. He gets emails, texts, voicemails, Facebook messages. “Sometimes I don’t get back to them right away. It might take, actually, a half a day sometimes. But eventually they hear back from me.”

A half a day? Imagine if every public official took service that seriously. The best ones, Stucky says, “understand Servant Leadership.”

He doesn’t hesitate when asked who best exemplifies those ideals in Whidbey politics. He names a local Republican and a Democrat, each of whom have repeatedly shown the courage to put principles over party ideology. Both are running for reelection at press time, so they won’t be named here, but suffice to say they have broad bipartisan support because bipartisan action is more than just lip service to them. And Stucky admires that.

When I ask Stucky about his personal goals as a local leader, he smirks for just a second. He knows that can be a loaded question. No, he doesn’t have grand designs as a career politician. He’s not building political capital for a run at a bigger office. At least not yet. Today, he still has plenty to learn in his third year on council, and it’s not just a bullet on his resume.

“My goal is to continue what I’m doing. I need to be present in the moment.”

And that, fellow citizens, is Servant Leadership.

William Walker’s monthly “Take a Breath” column seeks paths to unity on Whidbey Island in a time of polarization. Walker lives near Oak Harbor and is an amateur author of four unpublished novels, hundreds of poems, and a stage play. He blogs occasionally at playininthedirt.com